Long time no post.
Having major issues.
Emo-ing now and then.
Get high and hyper occasionally.

Don't say you know me, when I don't even know myself.

I think I'm afraid of being happy because everytime I'm happy, something bad always happens.

When I do something great, no one ever seems to remember, but when I do something wrong, no one can ever seem to forget.

There is only one rain cloud in the sky...and it's raining on me. Somehow I'm not surprised.

I wake up and think dreams are real. I sleep so I don't have to feel.

Walking down the hall with her head held high, every hair is in its place, sees a friend and she waves hi, wearing a smile on her perfect face. Friendly, smart, and beautiful, everyone adores this girl. Seemingly content, her head's in a whirl. Inside she's unhappy, and doesn't know why. She lays in her bed at night and cries. She doesn't know what causes the tears; how could this princess have insecurities or fears? She has it all. A pretty smile, many friends, a great guy, the newest trends, her family has money, she gets good grades, has her own car, and her makeup never fades. Always looking happy, every single day, but inside she's feeling a different way. This is wonder girl, she's everyone's dream, but things aren't always what they seem.

Behind my smile is everything you'll never understand.

No matter what, no matter who, no matter what I do, somebody hates me. -Reel Big Fish-

I didn't want to admit it. It was easier to lie. Hide the hurt and emptiness to smile instead of cry.

I've learned it takes years to build up trust, but only seconds to destroy it.

Life doesn't hurt until you think about how much things have changed, who you've lost along the way, and how much of it was your fault.

I don't know if I'm getting better or just used to the pain.

When I cry at night, the only thing I can think to myself is...how can I seem so---perfectly fine in the morning. Why do I smile like nothing is wrong? And how does not one single person notice that I'm not okay?

I don't know what I want in life. I don't know what I want right now. All I know is that I'm hurting so much inside that it's eating me, and one day, there won't be any more of me left. Everything that ever cause a tear to trickle down my cheeks, I run away and hide from it. But now, everything is unwinding and finding its way back towards me. And I don't know what to do. I just know that the pain I felt so long ago, it's hurting ten times more.

Words hurt more than anything else can, because they last, sometimes forever.

It sucks to be alone, even when there are people all around you. -Scrubs-

Have you ever lived my life, have you ever spent one minute in my shoes? If you haven't, then tell me why you judge me like you do.

Every morning you get up and put on a fake smile...but what if one morning you didn't? Would anyone notice?

I'm not saying I have nothing. I'm not saying I'm gone completely. It's just sometimes it's all a bit too much to handle. Sometimes I feel like it's too much. I'm not going to do anything stupid because I know it will get better, it has to right? Otherwise there wouldn't be anyone who would live past their teenage years. But for now, just for now, it hurts.

You know sometimes, like when someone dies, and you're sad, and it's ok to be sad? But then there are times when you're supposed to be happy but you're sad anyway...and those times are even worse than the times when you're supposed to be sad.

~ I just don't feel like I know myself very well right now, so how can I be sure about anything? Most of the time I feel so awkward, you know, like I don't belong in my own skin, I get frustrated at everything, I could just scream and there's no reason for it, I just hate myself.

Credits:http://hope1911.tripod.com/id17.html